Torn ©️

Growing up, I knew there was more wrong than right, in our home, however, I also knew that I had a Dad who loved and cared about me and if not for he and my maternal grandmother, I probably would not have survived. My mother was extremely abusive toward me and the rest of our family as well, however, in her defense, she was also a victim of DV.
Even today, I find myself confused and torn.
My Dad passed away in spring of 2008. He was considered a genius. He was one of the most knowledgeable and capable people I have ever known. He was a WWll vet, a tradesman and earned many licenses during his young life and started his own, successful business and worked that business until he was in his mid sixties. All the while, raising my mothers two boys from her previous marriage and my younger brother and I. My mother was a waitress and not because she had to work, but because she chose to.
Part of my confusion comes from the crazy dynamic that existed between her and my Dad. On one hand, his goal was to make sure she was happy and had all she needed to be content and on the other hand, when he drank, he drank to excess and more times than not, this led to some of the most extreme violence I have ever seen and heard of. In the sixties and seventies, there was very little if any protocol when it came to the laws that govern domestic violence and abuse today. There were a few occasions that the abuse landed mother in the hospital and although everyone knew, by her injuries, that this didn’t happen by tripping over a phone cord, they didn’t report any of her injuries to law enforcement or any other agency that could have intervened.

2 thoughts on “Torn ©️

  1. Sharing your childhood experience of domestic violence takes so much courage. I can’t imagine all that you have witnessed. I agree that it can be so confusing even after being away from it after many years. DV work is needed.

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